Women Encouraging Women: I’m a Mom of Teens and You Can, Too! {Beth’s Story}
I’m so delighted to bring this post from Beth to you. Somehow I stumbled across her blog and social media earlier this year or last fall, and I feel like we’d be fast friends if it weren’t for the 3,000 miles of USA between us. Enjoy this read and feel the love and encouragement she’s sending to you!
“You know, if I could just have a bunch of babies and take care of them while they’re little, but ship them off to somebody else when they get big and mean, that would be ideal.”
Yep. I said that when my husband and I were newly married and talking about starting a family.
“Teenagers scare the crap out of me.”
Yep. That was me again! Except this was much more recently…you know, around the time my oldest was turning 13.
Thankfully, though, we have a playful God who likes to have fun with us humans. Not sure you like big kids, Beth? Well, here come a couple teenagers. Oh! Teenage boys in particular are a conundrum to you? Let’s make sure you have two of them back to back. Well-played, Lord. Well-played, indeed, seeing as I’m now the mom of two boys aged 16 and 13 and two girls aged 10 and 7.
See, what God knew that I didn’t was that only through actually having and raising my own big kids, could I understand what a joy they actually are! Of course, like any of the ages and stages of parenting, it’s not all sunshine and rainbows. There are good days and bad days…for the kids and for me! But I want to share just a few reasons why I am loving this particular phase of motherhood and why having big kids (even having teenagers!) shouldn’t leave you fearful of the future.
First of all, they are so much fun! On a recent trip to Target, we picked up the board game Sorry. The time we have spent around the kitchen table just laughing and playing, teasing and enjoying each other has been priceless!
Second, they’re helpful! Now, I will say that you have to lay the groundwork for this when they are young, but the rewards are plentiful. But from laundry to dishes, vacuuming to toilets, these kids know what it means to help the family by caring for our home. Are they always happy about it? Heck no! But are they able and willing? You bet.
And it’s not just with chores that they help out. The bigger these kids get, the more they help each other. Big ones help smaller ones as they work together to solve problems or even get their homework done! And thank goodness my oldest is a math whiz. I don’t think I’d be much help for anybody beyond about 4th grade by this point!
Family trips are a lot easier now, too. It’s so freeing to know that everyone can pull their own suitcase, pack their own backpacks, and read their own books. And amusement parks are a whole lot more fun when everyone can ride the rides and Mom & Dad don’t have to sit out with the littles.
Shoot, even dinner time is more enjoyable! Whether you’re out at a restaurant or around your own table, having big kids is awesome. They cut their own food, fill their own plates, and the conversations you can have are fantastic!
So, yeah. These are a bunch of surface-level reasons that I love being a mom of older kids. The truth is, though, that there is just so much more! There are moments of parenting these ever-growing, ever-evolving people that take your breath away every bit as much as when they were babies. Those little ones that you heard laugh for the first time and watched take their first steps will surprise and thrill you like you’d never imagine.
The moment you see them take off down the street free from training wheels for the first time…
When you lay your head on your teenage son’s shoulder instead of the other way around…
Watching your pre-teen daughter learn to love her body and find her passion through dance lessons…
Smiling through tears as they receive the Eucharist…
Knowing that they mean it when they are confirmed and say YES to their own faith…
Laughing hysterically as your son’s sense of humor blossoms into one of his best traits…
Hearing them cheer each other on when they recognize each other’s accomplishments…
I truly could go on and on.
So, Moms of Littles, I guess this is really what it comes down to. You will never hear me tell you to enjoy every minute. That advice is kinda crazy, so I’ll leave that to the well-meaning, somewhat forgetful, dreamy-eyed old ladies in line behind you at the grocery store.Rather, what I encourage you to do is this: Find the best in every phase of childhood, no matter how old they get. Look backward with fondness and look forward with hope. It will make the hard parts more bearable and the good parts that much better.
Beth Williby is a part-time music teacher, part-time singer, part-time blogger, and full-time wife and mom. She enjoys good chocolate and coffee with cream and sugar. You’ll often find her cheering her children on at some game or performance together with her husband of 19 years. A Midwesterner at heart, she and her family live in Northeast Florida. Find Beth blogging at A Welcome Grace, and also as a contributor to the Blessed Is She blog.
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